Let's Go Back Even Further Still (Part One)

I am not your typical Navy wife. Or maybe I am. I'm not sure yet since I'm so new to this but I feel like I should give you some background info. I am twenty two years old and I haven't been married for a year yet. My son isn't quite two years old. If you're keeping count that means I had my son at twenty and was pregnant with him at nineteen.

Yes, I'm a young mom. Yes, I made mistakes. Would I do it over again if I could? No. I believe that I meant my husband and got pregnant young for a reason. I believe it was God's way of saving me from the life I was living which was not good. At all. 

You see I was a stupid girl who didn't think I could find love so I messed around with guy after guy after guy. I'm not sure what I was looking for with all these men but I knew that I hadn't found anything but heartache. The only problem was that my teenage mind couldn't find a way to escape. Maybe I didn't want to. Maybe a part of me liked the attention. Either way I was headed nowhere fast. So I joined a dating site. Ok it was a social networking site but still most of the people on it used it for dating. 

There I was sitting on my laptop minding my own business when suddenly I received a message from someone. This message was different. It wasn't one of those typical 'hey, you're hot messages'. It was actually asking for my opinion on something. This person actually wanted to know something about me that had nothing to do with my physical appearance. 

He asked me what my favorite type of music was and that led to a conversation about our favorite bands. Pretty soon the conversation led to Facebook and from there to the phone. Finally we were talking so much that he asked me out on a date. A real date. 

Let me make a confession to you dear reader. In my almost nineteen years of life I had never been on a date before. Never. 

We didn't like each other at first. I didn't find him too attractive and he didn't find me too attractive either but we went to Tacobell and a movie and it was fun. After the date I kinda went about my business. I honestly didn't think I was going to see him again. At least not as anything other than a friend. But apparently God had  other plans because a few days later he invited me to his sisters birthday party. 

We hung out in his room and ate pizza until it was time for everyone to go to the mall. 

We didn't do you typical teenage window shopping. Instead we looked at furniture and stoves. We picked out our favorite washing machines; which coincidentally happened to be the same ones. Something was at work here. 

We got back to his house and I let my hair loose from it's ponytail. He looked at my funny and told me he liked me with my hair down. Then we kissed.  

Back to Where It All Began

Hello dear readers,

It is very late and I can't sleep. I keep trying and trying but sleep just won't come to me. It's been happening a lot lately these past few months since he's been gone. 

He is my Husband. My Sailor. My Soul-mate. My Best Friend. He is everything to me and more. But it's been a long hard road and it's only just now getting somewhat easier. 

He wasn't always a sailor. In fact he's just now becoming one. Right now as we speak my Sailor is sleeping in a room with two other men. He will wake up and go to school and come back to a place where I can't go.  He is in Chicago, IL. where he was for Navy boot camp and where he'll be until he comes home.

This bed is lonely. Sure my almost two year old son is sleeping next to me but there is still an emptiness. A void that only a husband can fill. But I wouldn't have it any other way right now. Because my Sailor is doing great things for our family.

You see we didn't always have a stable income. In fact, we hardly had an income at all but we managed. Our son never went without diapers or wipes or clothes ever. Sure, we as parents went without from time to time but he was more important. Taking care of him was more important that anything we may have wanted or needed but it just wasn't working.

Living in a trailer with my family wasn't working. Sharing a room with my then 14 year old sister wasn't working. Nothing about the situation was. So my Loserface did what he had to do. He walked down the street to our local recruitment center and he joined the Navy. He did it for our future. He did it for our son. He did it for us.

So yes, I may complain from time to time about my empty bed but believe me I'm still thankful. I'm very thankful for what my husband is doing for us and I'll continue to be thankful. I will never forget what he did to save our little family. 

Never,

Amber